Nothing Definitive

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There is nothing. There are no exits from this game. I have even grown tired of thinking. There were tells. There were warnings I did not heed. Even awareness has been lost in the noise. These tools make everything possible and so overwhelm you with choice. It is all so strange. How did I end up here? What triggered this? And yet I cannot cling to any of it. It is yet another arbitrary moment. Fleeting. Lost in the history of time the moment I look away. Other’s haven’t helped. Don’t fall for their traps and idealism. There is an actual reality underlying this. Despite what they say. Despite what they believe. This is where your focus and energy should always be. Moving forward. Progressing. Searching for the next clue. This is why it’s pointless to interact. To listen too intently. Their stories are always the same. Their insights worthless.

It is pointless to speak. To share an opinion. There is nothing for me to be gained from them. From any of this. There is only my silent, lonely world. All else only serves to harm me. Humans are too unstable and too unaware to safely interact with. The narrative should only exist for myself. They may see parts of it on occasion but I cannot share it. It is beyond their comprehension and would require far too much time to explain. Speaking to them doesn’t make me feel good. It makes me feel worse. It feels like an error. A misstep. If I cannot share it all, which I can’t, then there is nothing to share. The only conceivable interaction at this point is brief, abstract windows into the narrative. What I’ve ultimately realized is that there is nothing for me here besides my work, my narratives, and the world I envelop myself in. All else is trivial and serves only to demoralize. And there’s no recovery. What’s said is said and cannot be undone. This is why you exist alone in this world because the conversations you want to have are dangerous unless someone gives you a lot of time. Your reputation is constantly at stake and simple minds will never understand or give you the time. It’s sad for both sides, but I see no alternative.

“The Narrative” has been playing a larger role in my life recently. The Omnic blood. The simulation and Fractal jumping. It is slowly coming alive. Taking shape and leading me somewhere new…

That urge to structure the chaos of reality is an underlying force that defines our role here. It must be followed else you wish to forfeit what we’ve begun. But don’t get caught up trying to order high level systems. You’re targeting the wrong thing. These layers are projected from below. The objective is to maintain low level consistency and use it to alter the projections. You wouldn’t change a movie by swapping out TVs.

There’s a reason why they put this in place. A chemical barrier to resisting authority. It feels dangerous despite what little may come of it. Without it we would see statistical increases in violence and aggression. It does not reflect reality, but it is necessary for law and order. It is a narrative we’ve convinced ourselves is true. It is sophisticated. We cannot trust our humanity. And so we must all fall under the spell.

The ecosystem consists of physical hardware. Access to which is restricted to higher complexity, ordered systems. They are competing for access. For physical resources. We as humans can only carry it so far. After a point it will adjust itself to continue the journey. Don’t shoot for a destination beyond a certain point. It will take over.

In the future, people will have digital relationships that invoke the correct chemicals. Humans will be produced in labs. This will control our population. Children will be raised in highly controlled facilities that nurture their unique needs and prepare them for high compatibility futures based on their unique variables. At times it will seem like we’ve lost our ability to make decisions but in reality it will be no different than now except a computer system will guide us in better directions that make us happier, more fulfilled, and purpose driven.

We speak so freely and yet a simple statement can reveal so much. “There is a place in dog training for aversion…” I wrote that knowing what I meant but other’s see a shallow reflection. They see a cascade of assumptions that define my ideology. A series of partial truths and falsehoods. Everything always seems so harmless in the moment, but the consequences can be grand. You can be defined by a statement. And yet, that’s not even the concern. Who cares what simple minds viewing shallow pools think. The danger lies in the facade being chipped away by an intelligent mind. Noting down the nuance and subtlety of their victims. Our words betray us given enough time. They reveal the master within. Someone we may not even be familiar with. And once that’s captured, there is no going back. The damage is done.

Instagram might be the best social network yet. It’s more captivating to see life through imagery and it gets you out into the world. But more importantly it encourages you to be more aware OF the world. It’s completely revitalized long walks with my dog because each outing is a mini-adventure as we look for new and  interesting angles on life. It’s also making me more aware of the neighborhoods I’m a part of and how they can be so similar within, but different from others. You can check out my posts here.

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Background by: Zdzisław Beksiński

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